Hello! 👋 

Welcome to Issue 15 of the weekly Chronic Evolution newsletter, where I share mindfulness tips, tricks, and anecdotes to help you evolve your mindset in 5 minutes or less.

Let’s get right into it.

To Get to Where You Want To Be in Life, Lean Into the Chaos

What if life’s hardest moments – the ones where you felt the most uncomfortable, the most out of balance, the most chaotic – were actually the moments that could reveal your deepest desires?

I think they are. And science backs me up.

Put on your biology cap and buckle up because we're going all the way back to homeostasis. (With a personal development spin, of course.)

Ebbs and flows are a part of life

Every second of every day, your body is working towards homeostasis – either getting into a stable, balanced state or maintaining it.

“Failure of homeostasis” is your body’s worst nightmare because it means your cells aren’t getting everything they need to thrive. If homeostasis isn’t restored, we can get sick or even die.

At a biological level, homeostasis is the gold standard that every cell strives to achieve. But what if we’ve carried that relentless pursuit of optimization into other parts of our life as well?

Perhaps the quest for perfection is built into our genetic code, just like the caution signals your body would send out if you walked into a dark alleyway alone at night.

Perfection is unrealistic

Expecting yourself to attain a mythical level of “perfection” is unrealistic — but, assuming you reach it, expecting yourself to maintain it is downright unfair.

I did that with my chronic pain. I took my pain from an 8 on a pain scale to a 0. When my hip started flaring again, I panicked for a moment, fearing this was the return of my chronic pain. I immediately started berating myself for bringing this on – I was sitting too much, working too many hours, not exercising enough, not eating right.

But my pain held a lesson for me. And when I slowed down and calmed my brain, I could hear it.

You’re going to have peaks and valleys in every area of your life, from your health to your relationships to your career. If you’re at a low point, try to be compassionate with yourself about not reaching your exacting standards.

These hard times can be more than a burden. We can use these messy, disordered, chaotic moments as a north star to guide us home. Let’s break down how.

Chaos is our roadmap to balance

The opposite of homeostasis is chaos, disorder, and imbalance – all words with a typically negative connotation. But what if our “out of balance” moments are actually crucial guideposts on the map of our lives, guiding us where we need to go?

Remember that hip pain I talked about earlier? Turns out it was actually a canary in the coal mine telling me it was time to make a change, to adjust and adapt. And that’s okay. I wasn’t designed to live in a permanent state of equilibrium, and neither were you.

Life isn’t a linear journey – we’re never going to “arrive” at a final destination in our health, our relationships, or our careers and just stay there forever. We’ll adjust and make tweaks as we navigate the complexities of life, with the only true endpoint being death. (And some would argue that death is not an endpoint at all but a new beginning.)

If you’re willing to lean into the chaos and get a little – perhaps a lot – uncomfortable, then here’s how you can apply these concepts to steer your own life ship:

• Gather information: Rather than resisting disorder and immediately trying to fix it, ask yourself what it might be able to teach you. Why has it appeared in your life? Is it time to make a change? Are you truly happy doing what you do or living where you are?

• Discover fresh perspectives: Chaos in any area of your life can act as a catalyst to break you out of your habitual ways of thinking, feeling, or behaving. You may suddenly be able to see patterns of behaviors that no longer serve you – and acknowledge the need for change.

• Identify imbalances: Feeling out of balance physically could be indicative of an imbalance in other areas of your life, such as work-life balance, relationships, or self-care. This is an excellent time to reflect on your current choices and ask the hard questions necessary to determine whether they align with your values and priorities.

• Identify hidden passions: At times of imbalance, you’re more likely to make yourself priority number one. When you’re less worried about conforming or pleasing others or adhering to societal norms and expectations, you may uncover new possibilities, passions, or aspirations you wouldn’t have discovered otherwise.

One Final Question

Homeostasis is not a static state of balance and stability – it’s a dynamic process that involves adapting to changes and challenges. We can apply those same principles to personal growth by recognizing chaos or imbalance in life as a transformative opportunity for learning, reshaping perspectives, and fostering self-discovery.

I’ll leave you with one final question to contemplate: In what areas of your life can you embrace the chaos and use it as a catalyst for personal growth?

To your chronic evolution,

Carly 

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